Dinner: Café Vasco da Gama

Café Vasco da Gama, 1472 Peel (514) 286-2688

Met up with my good friend Depeche Mode this evening. DM went to a science fiction convention in Toronto this weekend and so I was anxious to hear all about it. Let's get that out of the way. She said that the sci fi convention was a snooze but that Toronto isn't as bad as it used to be. There's at least some good shopping around Queen/Kensington. Kidding, Torontonians! Someone's got to keep the feud going at a healthy pace.

Anyway, there are two related restaurants at which I have always meant to eat: Café Ferreira and Café Vasco da Gama. In case you were unable to pick it up, those are Portuguese restaurants. However, these ones are quite high end. Montreal isn't a bad place to get Portuguese food since there is a healthy Portuguese community here. On the other hand, run like the wind if someone suggests Mexican.

Tonight, we opted for Café Vasco da Gama since we wanted to keep our expenditures relatively low. Yeah, McDonald's would have been cheaper but...ughhh...I'm not finishing that sentence. I can't believe I even said that in jest. So, Café Ferreira isn't really a café. It is a restaurant that seems to cater to a young business crowd. Vasco da Gama, however, caters to the "I want a snack and I want it to both taste good and look good" crowd.

The first thing that I noticed about this place is the staff are very friendly. I like friendly staff. When I buy something, I like to have a mini conversation with the people who have sold me whatever it is that I have bought. It can't hurt to exchange a few pleasantries. It makes things nicer for everyone and lets you maintain the view that people are, in general, very nice.

We selected a couple of tables away from the window near the cash. Outwardly, we did this absentmindedly but subconsciously I think we did that for two reasons: (1) we could see the food from our seats and (2) we would be away from people smoking in the street. The seating was nice, but a tad uncomfortable as the non-bench seating consisted of low plush stools. It was stylish but not very practical.

Vasco da Gama is like any café in that you've got to look at the display and choose your food. However, they will bring your selections to your table. The display case was filled with all kinds of portuguese-inspired sandwiches" chorizo, cochon de lait, tuna burgers and the like. They also had a tapas menu, which I definitely have to try the next time I am there. There are also desserts, appetizers and, well, let me just get right into what I ordered.

To start, I opted for two cod cakes (bacalhau). Cod cakes are a popular Portuguese starter. They are also a popular breakfast dish in Caribbean culture. If I go for Portuguese, I usually have the cod cakes since I love them but I am too lazy to make them at home. Although I enjoyed Vasco da Gama's cod cakes, I usually like them to taste a little more like salted cod. These were very inoffensive if you know what I mean. Nice presentation though.


For the main meal I chose a sandwich of lamb confit with caramelized onions and mint. The sandwiches come with a soup or a salad so I opted for the soup, which was a thick zucchini and apple purée. It sounded too good to pass up and the weather in Montreal was nippy today. The sandwich was very good, but the soup was excellent. I love a sandwich that combines sweet with salty. I didn't notice much of a mint taste, but I'd definitely order this sandwich again. The soup was absolutely delicious. I love a good, thick purée of vegetable soup - especially squash or sweet potato-based ones. The zucchini base works very well and I guess the apple takes some of the bitter taste out of the soup. The end result was a soothing taste that had some bite to it.

Next, they brought dessert. I selected the crème caramel in porto sauce. I have to confess something to you. I have an aversion to jiggly food or food that is soft bubble-like. I don't like jello, tapioca or roe, for example. However, I always get tempted by things like flan/crème caramel. It just looks good. Sometimes my desire for crème caramel ends up with me gagging on a disgustingly jiggly piece of dessert flesh. Sometimes the crème caramel goes down smooth as though I were never afflicted with this strange, throat-closing aversion. Luckily, Vasco da Gama's crème caramel passed the throat test. The dessert went down like any self-respecting dessert should.

Well, we sat there in the café for a pretty long time chatting about life, love, music and politics while sipping on our respective earl grey teas - mine with raw sugar, hers with sugar and cream. No one bothered us, the atmosphere was pleasant, the patrons were polite and respectful and the decor was resplendent in all its Luso-fusion goodness.

Vasco da Gama caters. They'll do it for a minimum of six people. I think I may take advantage of that service one day as the prices aren't too steep.

All in all, a decent place. It's a place to stop in for about a half-hour, longer if you get bench seating. They serve alcohol, so a quick drink after work or a short conversation over espresso is a good bet. I say three and a half stars - good food, but the environment could be more inviting.

Love and Kisses,
Laurelle

Dinner: Area
Restaurant Area, 1429, rue Amherst (514) 890-6691

Sabrina Sextina and I decided that it was high time that we went out and showed the world what fabulously sophisticated, fantastically dressed, gastronomically knowledgeable young chickadees we are. Really, we're a couple of closet nerds, but you couldn't tell by looking at us. Oh yeah, Ms. Sextina came by the other day and left me a pile of computer games and old Ranma episodes. She and I visited a Warhammer store the other day. We sat up late one night playing one of those Japanese games of logic that gets distributed around the Internet. But yeah, you'd never know it by the thoroughly salope-y way that we dress.

So, Sextina and St. Laurent decided that we deserved a night out on the town in all of our glory and we set about selecting a restaurant at which to shove our total fabulousness into everybody's face.

Serves us right for projecting our narcissistic sides into the cosmos. People, welcome to a bad review.

After drooling and drooling over the picture to the left (vegetarians and vegans, shut your eyes) we decided to go to Area for dinner. Look at the picture people! Look at it! That cut of meat looks so succulent! I can taste it, even knowing that I had a crap time at this restaurant. Look at that bone. Aren't you dying to such the marrow from that thing?

So, after browsing the website we selected our preferred dishes in advance, plus alternates, and headed off to Area.

Now, I'm sure many of you know what is about to follow. First, let me start with our arrival.

Area is located on Amherst, a few steps from Beaudry metro and just north of Ste-Catherine. You can see right into the restaurant from the street and the layout is such that on one side of the door there is a table and on the other side is the reception area. This is all scaled very small. Ironically, there is not much area. We arrived at about the same time as a middle-aged couple. They just edged in front of us and presented themselves to the host. We could see from the street that the restaurant was packed, with two empty tables-for-two remaining. The couple in front of us did not seem to have made reservations. We had made reservations. However, the host did not ask us about our reservations. Instead he gave us the "just one minute" sign. Hmm. He didn't ask us if we had a reservation. As it was, the couple barely let us into the reception area, so we were only half through the door when he gave us the sign. I'd love to wait, comfortably, on the seating. However, Mr. No Reservation is blocking the door. A polite "please sir, could you allow these ladies to enter" would have sufficed. The host came back and announced to the couple: Ah! You are lucky. We have only one free table. He then proceeded to seat the reservationless couple at the table that we would have preferred. Hmmm. Finally, he greeted us. Yes, we have the reservation, follow me.

He seated us right at the window, fully visible from the street and completely isolated from the rest of the restaurant. Quite a feat given the smallness of the entire space. This seat would have been perfect for a couple, much like the reservationless couple that had been seated before us. For two young girls showing off their moxie, not so good. Sometimes, it is nice to interact with the street, but not when that street is dead. This was, after all, Amherst, not Ste-Catherine. We did see an absolutely adorable bear/twink couple walk by though. Awwww.

We decided to make the best of our location. Except, our table was directly over an air conditioning vent. That and we had a great view of the scariest cactus plant that seemed to be trying to escape the restaurant. It was quite a warning.

At first, Sabrina sat over the offending vent (for which the staff apologized). She immediately began to sniffle. Ms. Sextina isn't good with manufactured air. I, however, can handle it so we switched seats and I donned by jacket thus covering my magnificently indecent "shirt." Eventually they covered the vent with a menu. Classy. Whatever. Just bring us some food. We were RAVENOUS.

At the table they had some fleur de sel, which we both tasted. I'm not a salt connaisseur, but I appreciate a nice fleur de sel so that was a cute touch. They brought us some bread, thank God, but no plates. Since we were starving, we just grabbed some bread, slathered it with butter and chowed down. That little hint didn't encourage anyone to bring us some side plates. Our waitress did, however, bring us a little surprise, an amuse-bouche of satay de veau. At least that's what I think she said. It was meat on a stick. It was good and we were happy to get it, as hungry as we were. And now we even had plates, so we sopped up the sauce with some more bread and then held on to those coveted plates for dear life. The cactus loomed in the background, pleading for escape.

Now, some of you anticipated this moment. When we looked at the menu, HORRORS, it wasn't the same menu displayed on the web. We went through that arduous selection process for nothing! Dejected, we began the process anew.

And so we come to the part of the meal where the evening went from mediocre to disaster.
The thing to know about Area's menu is that it is 85% appetizers, 5% drinks, 5% dessert and 5% main dishes. Creating a full meal out of this proved to be a difficult task. I settled on 4 oysters, the crevettes décortées in a Madras curry tempura and the gigot d'agneau. Frankly, my meal was okay. Just okay. In the menu, the shrimp dish (crevettes) was supposed to come with 4 shrimp. It came with 3 shrimp. No biggie, I suppose. The gigot d'agneau came medium rare but it was slightly chewy. The dish was lukewarm temperature-wise. Sextina ordered 8 oysters, a lobster flesh dish with tempura flakes and the foie gras poêlé. Her meal was, well, gooooddd, exceeepppttt, the dishes were teeny tiny. Specifically, the $14 lobster dish ended up being much closer to a terrine purée than "pieces of lobster flesh" as the menu had suggested. Her meal, along with one vodka martini, had put her bill thus far at close to $80. And she was still hungry. As was I. Thank God for the bread. We asked for more.

The restaurant, thankfully, is mostly non-smoking. The only place in which one can smoke is the reception area, opposite us, on the other side of the door. The reception area. Where one gets one's first impression of the restaurant. Where one is greeted. Is. Where. People. Smoke. And smoke they did, cigarette after cigarette after cigarette. But hey, we were kept well preserved and aerated by the icy cold vent.

When the embarrassingly small lobster dish was placed in front of her, my dear Sabrina's face fell. And it remained crestfallen until the end, it exuded disappointment as only one could after such a heartbreaking crash. Eighty dollars? To leave hungry? My dishes, though more substantial, amounted to $60 thus far. We finished much the the "meal" in silence until the waitress took the empty dishes away and brought us the dessert menu. I had had my eye on a mouthwatering chocolate dish, but looking at Sabrina I realized that my heart I wasn't in it and neither was hers. This wasn't the night that we had been anticipating for nearly a week. We had to end it before it got any worse. We had to limit the extent of the financial disaster that this meal had proved to be. So, when the waitress came back we politely declined without offer up any kind of plausible excuse. We paid up our bills and exited through a smoke filled haze into the blissfully accepting street. Yes, we had accomplished what that poor cactus had never managed to do. We had escaped that horror of a meal.

Our waitress really was nice though, so we did leave her a kind tip.

Since we really were hungry, we went down the street to Kilo for pecan pie and sugar pie and cappuccino and beer and we smiled laughed and giggled at the amateur night Drag Queen show going on across the street at Sky. The cutest little boy named Steven assured us that the professional show on Fridays was much better. And don't we look just fabulous. He hoped to see us there. Yay! That's why I love the gay village. The men always show up when you are at your worst and make you feel like you are at your best.

So, while I love Kilo and I love the gay village, I do not love Area. If your prices are high, make sure the food is top notch. And filling. And don't let your customers smoke in the reception area. It stinks up the hair of every customer who walks in. And ask your patrons who have reserved a table whether they would like to experience the ambience of the place rather than the deadness of the street.

Two stars. And that's largely based on the wonderful service and sympathetic looks we received from our waitress.

Love and Kisses,
Laurelle

Dinner: Holder's
Holder Restaurant Bar, 407 McGill (514) 849-0333

Look! It's Laurelle at Holders!

So, I got invited to my friend's birthday party. She's a photographer and a fashionista at heart despite being currently shacked to the pharmaceutical industry. Instead of calling her "Drugsy," I think I'll call her The Fabulous Ms. G (TFMG).

Just so you know, TFMG has great friends. They're hilarious.

So the decision to go to Holder's was like a long and arduous journey. There was a lot of back and forth between me and TFMG and so I'm sure there was a lot of back and forth between her and her great friends. I suggested many restaurants and disparaged many others and finally TFMG settled on one to which I'd never been. Great! Hope I don't get poisoned.

Being without a significant other, I attended TFMG's birthday extravaganza with La Française. She is my permadate and I am hers when she is without testosterone. Neither of us much felt like going anywhere beyond the Starbucks at which we were comfortably ensconced, but neither of us can pass up a potentially good meal and I totally and completely lofe TFMG so I would never have missed her party for the world.

Right.

So TFMG's party was a party of 13. That's actually my lucky number. I am born on the 13th day of December. Good things even happen to me on Friday the 13th. So, this was a good sign. Wait a minute, I think we were actually a party of 12. Crap. Doesn't look so good now.

La Française and I were the first to arrive. How embarrassing. Fortunately, TFMG and company arrived shortly thereafter and proceeded to engage in drink snorting antics. We were amused.

Eventually, this rambunctious party decided to order. La Française and I had the same thing. We split an appetizer and a dessert and we both had the same main meal. We ordered:

appetizer: calamari spiral
main meal: beefsteak with fries OR french green beans
dessert: triple crème brulée

Ok. First, I'd like to say our waitress was just wonderful. She handled our table of 12, possibly 13, very well. Sometimes when you're part of a large group, they assume that you will interact among yourselves so much that you won't notice their crappy service. Not this lady. She kept on top of us the entire time.

Now, the food. Wow! I was shocked at the good quality of this food. Maybe it's because I went in with low expectations. I mostly know Holder's as a 5 à 7 type of place where businesspeople mingle after work. I had no idea that the food would be so good.

The calamari spiral was a two-tiered spiral, so that God we shared the dish. It was the perfect texture. I'm willing to make this my top calamari experience thus far, and I've had a lot of calamari-fueled nights. It came with two sauces: marinara and tartar. The marinara sauce was the best of the two. It was not too tomato-ey and had a good kick of spiciness. The tartar sauce was maybe a little oily for my taste, but I think it consisted of homemade mayonnaise. It was good nonetheless.

When you order the beefsteak, you can have fries OR french green beans, not both. We asked. The waitress said no - it's an either/or deal. Ha! No ordering halvesies, you say? Either/or, you say? Well we sure pulled one over on you. I chose green beans and la Française chose fries. When our dishes came, we GAVE EACH OTHER HALF OUR SIDE ORDER. Suckers! So we DID get half-and-half after all. Holder's, please rectify this immediately. Half-and-half on side dishes should be allowed.

The french green beans came dressed in butter and hazelnuts, I believe. They were bright green (which I love) and just crispy (which I also love). The fries were just fries. They were good, but no better than any other fries that were good.

Now, I know some of you meat-lovers will faint when I say this but I take my beef well done. I mean ashes coming off the meat. I know, I know, I ruin a good cut of meat. I don't care. I don't want any blood with my food. Nothing turns my stomach more than an order of "steak, make it blue." In any case, my beefsteak did not come well done, it came medium well. I didn't complain, I ate it anyway. You know, it was pretty darn good. No, it was excellent. So, maybe in the future I'll order my meat medium well. Just maybe.

Now, understandable, la Française and I were scared that the dessert wouldn't live up to the rest of the meal. The triple crème brulée consists of three small crème brulées of various flavours. They are: sour orange, amaretto and chocolate. La Française thinks the best one was the chocolate, but I say the best was the sour orange. It doesn't matter, they were all good. The amaretto came with a meringue topping that was incredibly tasty (I don't usually like meringue so this is a meal of making me like things that I don't like. In that case, Holder's, bring on the tapioca, jello and roe). The orange sour one had a slightly bitter taste that blended very well with cream. Speaking of cream, the texture of these crème brulées was just brilliant. It was chilled without being cold and nicely creamy. Sometimes, a crème brulée can be too hard, too custardy. This was creamy - nicely solid without being stiff. The chocolate one was like what you would get if you blended chocolate mousse with crème brulée. That's the only way I can describe it.

Okay, I was loving this restaurant, but then the bill came and changed my opinion. I loved it even more! The total on my bill was $32.65, including 4.27 in taxes. The quality of this meal was worth about $60 - 70$ before tax and tip. So, I feel like I got a good deal. They even charged me only half the appetizer and half the dessert on my bill. Nicely organized, Holder's.

So, thanks to the Fabulous Ms. G for inviting me to a great restaurant to which I shall certainly return.

The rating? Four stars. You know, I would have given it four and a half stars, or even five stars, but they brought my meat medium well when I specifically requested that it be well done. And, they should have let us go halvsies on the side order, especially since we both ordered the same thing. It should have been no skin off their backs to accomodate our plates. So, FOUR STARS. But, I'll definitely eat there again.

Hugs and Kisses,
Laurelle

Brunch: L'Avenue du Plateau
Restaurant L'Avenue, 922, Mont-Royal East (514)523-8780


So, the other day I got a phone call from my friend's husband (we'll call her "Depeche Mode"). He's a Muslim Jew. That has nothing to do with this review, but I thought I'd mention it anyway since the background story is interesting. I will not, however, give you the background story now. One day, at my blog, I may tell it.

Anyway, Depeche Mode's Husband (DMH) asked me to go to brunch. Since Depeche Mode was in Turkey visiting friends, and since DMH was new to Montreal, he was understandably bored. I, being a brunch whore, quickly accepted the invitation.

He came to pick me up and due partly to hunger and partly to lack of an imagination (also due to hunger) we settled on the immensely popular L'Avenue due Plateau. I first tried L'Avenue after noticing an ever-present line up outside the restaurant. Really, no matter when you drive by, there is a line. This is especially true during the weekend. One day I decided to join the line. That day is not this day. This day was my gazillionth time eating at that restaurant, except all those other times I did not have a restaurant review blog. So, let's say I didn't know how the food, ambiance and service would be until now. Let's all find out together.

So we get to L'Avenue and we join the line. The good thing about the line is it moves really quickly. They don't rush you inside the restaurant, but people know about the line up and in a big show of collective action, everyone just moves it along so that someone else can get inside.

A note about the line: when you get to the front of the line it gets especially torturous. This is because through the glass window you can see the fruit chefs chopping fruit. It looks so fresh and succulent. This is also because you can see empty seats that are not for you. So, you play this game with yourself (which causes you to cease conversing with your brunch companions and retreat to the inner recesses of your mind). You ask yourself: is that our seat? How about that one? I bet that's our seat. That's a table for two. No, no it isn't. They just put two tables for two together. So, it's a table for four. Crap. Wait, yes, there's another seat. They're motioning to us! It's ours! We're in!

We got seated near the front of the restaurant. Every seat in this restaurant is fine because, hey, it's a seat. So, our waitress brought us the menus. Our waitress is a red-headed waitress whom I've seen working at that restaurant for quite a while. Also, I think she goes to my gym, but that's neither here nor there. She's a really good waitress. She even told me what the music was - Jamiroquai's latest album. I think I'm going to buy it. Did you ever notice that the lead singer of Jamiroquai, Jay Kay, sounds just like Stevie Wonder? And once, on the Brit Awards, they did a duet and it sounded like only one person was singing. Whatever, I'm getting distracted.

The menus are in French. Or, at least, I've never asked for nor seen an English menu. This doesn't matter to most Montrealers, but I was worried for DMH being an ex-San-Fran-Jew (and current Montreal Muslim-Jew) and I offered to translate for him. Did I mention that DMH is a scriptwriter? More about that later. The point is, DMH could read the menu, so good for him. He even ordered in French.

Reading this menu is always an overwhelming experience since everything looks really good. They have crepes or waffles with almost any topping. Good toppings like carmelized banana and rum, or cheese and apple; not bad toppings like marshmallow and chocolate sauce. They also have "normal" breakfasts, omelettes and other assorted goodies. All of it is good, but beware the "eyes bigger than stomach" syndrome. The plates can be rich and filling.

I ordered a "normal" breakfast on this particular occasion. Two scrambled eggs, bacon and patates rissolées. Now, unlike Le Toaster, the potatoes at L'Avenue are really what I would call rissolées as opposed to "home fries." The potatoes are soooo gooood. They definitely cook them in A LOT of butter, but there must be something else that I can't identify. Oh, there's the usual stuff like garlic, onion, etc., but there's got to be something else, because these are extra good. As long as you order something without pancakes, crepes or waffles, you get a choice of bread. The choices are greater than or equal to the following: white bread, brown bread, belgian bread, baguette and bagel. I chose a baguette. Mmmm. This meal was so good. If I haven't hinted enough at it already, L'Avenue serves good food. One day you just know it's going to become over-rated, but that day hasn't arrived yet.

I also ordered a glass of blueberry/pineapple/banana juice. It came with a garnish of orange and kiwi. What do you want me to say? It was cold. It was fruity. It was excellent.

DMH liked his stuff too.

Now, I've mentioned before that the measure of a brunch is its coffee. To be honest, this coffee is just okay. However, in this case, the coffee is not a measure of the brunch, but something tells me that the judges will penalize L'Avenue for this when they reveal their final scores. The judges are picky that way.

Basically, this is the end of the review, but I mentioned that DMH is a scriptwriter. He just wrote a script partly set in Vietnam. A few days before this brunch, I had agreed to read it and give him some feedback. I hate movies set in warzones or war veteran movies, but this script is really good. And the end! Halfway through the script I still hadn't developed any sympathy for any of the characters, but once I did! Look out! I cried at the end. It will probably get made because DMH is kind of in the know in Hollywood. He's a voting member of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. Next year, Depeche Mode and I are going to vote for him. If we have anything to say about it, Tom Hanks, Tom Cruise, Gwyneth Paltrow, Julia Roberts, Steven Spielberg, Meg Ryan, Brad Pitt and Nicolas Cage have absolutely NO SHOT at an Oscar either as actors, directors, producers or executive producers.

My rating? FOUR STARS! Oh, snap! The judges deducted a FULL STAR just for the coffee.

Love and kisses,
Laurelle

Dinner: Cafeteria
3581 St-Laurent Blvd. (514) 849-3855

I went out with an old friend from high school for an early dinner. Now, originally we were going to eat at Shedd Café. Let me just say Shedd Café, thanks, but no thanks. Shedd Café DOES NOT HAVE A NON-SMOKING SECTION. Laughably, they tried to say that they are a bar and not a restaurant and thus they do not have to provide a non-smoking environment. Yeah, right. You have more restaurant seating allotted to eating than most of the "BARS" on St-Laurent Street. Shedd Café, expect a visit from the authorities 'cause I'm going to report you. Hope you topped up your bribery fund recently.

Now, Cafeteria. Since we chose to take our dollars elsewhere, we simply walked up the street to the usually very busy Cafeteria. Or maybe Cafeteria was busy 10 years ago. Whatever, it wasn't busy when we walked in. But, then again, it was only 6pm. I like peace and quiet, so it worked for me. Thankfully, Cafeteria has a non-smoking section even though they can make a very good argument for being a bar - a better argument than Shedd can make.

Since we basically had our pick of seats, we got to sit by the window. It took them a little bit too long to notice that we were waiting to be seated, but once we started to seat ourselves, they rushed over. From then on, the service was great. I think that at first the waitresses were in the back lamenting their most unfortunate waitressing uniforms. They looked like big pink bumblebees mixed with my 4th grade jazz dance outfit. I lamented that choice, I felt their pain, so I let that initial blip on their service records go.

Cafeteria offers a mostly Italian menu. For whatever reason, this is the first time that I noticed the substantial mussels menu. They had many different versions of mussels in sauce. When I sat down I had fully intended to order some version of steak frites. By the time the waitress arrived (which was quickly) I had settled on the "mussels in white wine and fine herbs." So did my friend.

Our dishes came in a reasonable amount of time. People. The mussels were FANTASTIC. So much so that I actually tried to duplicate them the next day. Seriously, I woke up craving mussels. The white wine sauce was perfect - chopped garlic, butter, scallions and wine. Not too buttery, and the aftertaste didn't have that overpowering tinge of alcohol. You know I'm not a drinker. I've already fessed up to that. My friend had a couple of glasses of the house white at $6.25 per glass. She said to tell you that it was good wine. So...that's what I'm telling you.

The mussels came with fries, which were pretty good too. Maybe they were a tad "buttery" but they suited me just fine. When we asked for more ketchup, the very friendly jazz-dancing bumblebee brought them in 30 seconds. Really, great service. I felt so sorry about the outfits.

I'm going to give this meal 4 stars, but the restaurant 3 1/2 stars, just because I know that it gets too noisy to have a good meal later into the night.

Hugs and kisses!
Laurelle